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Cheryl Mendoza

How He speaks to me…..Or… can't He just call my cell when He wants to talk?

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church

A prayer for a lifetime

_DSC2940Lord this world needs you.  I need you.  Help me not to react, but to find the path that leads to shalom in my life and in the lives of all.  Today as we think of that day so long ago when You gave us the power to make “Your kingdom come,” help us to not be distracted.  Give us the strength to be a conduit of the Holy Spirit that gives us the power that can change the world.

The angels sang on the day You were born and told the outsider, “Don’t be afraid!”  They made it clear that the redemption you were offering was “GOOD NEWS OF GREAT JOY, FOR ALL PEOPLE.”  Forgive us who call you LORD, but do not proclaim YOUR good news.  Forgive us for muddying the waters.  Let this Pentecost be different.  Help us to lay down our lives (our opinions/rights/our idols)  for our brothers and sisters.  What is done in humble love, though imperfect it may be, will be honored by You….and in that there is HOPE. 

Turned away from it all like a blind man

Sat on a fence but it don’t work

Keep coming up with love but it’s so slashed and torn

Why, why, why?

Love, love, love, love, love

Insanity laughs under pressure we’re breaking

Can’t we give ourselves one more chance?

Why can’t we give love that one more chance?

Why can’t we give love, give love, give love, give love

Give love, give love, give love, give love, give love?

‘Cause love’s such an old fashioned word

And love dares you to care for

The people on the edge of the night

And love dares you to change our way of

Caring about ourselves

This is our last dance

This is our last dance

This is ourselves under pressure

Under pressure

Pressure

Under Pressure….. Queen

Easter: Coffee, jammies and HOPE!

IMG_4885So here we are …. Stuck in the middle again.  I felt like this last year, when Mike was recovering from brain surgery.    Now?  Well there’s nothing like a global pandemic to put life on hold.  But is life really on hold, or has the focus just shifted?   Maybe here in the middle is where we regain perspective? 

 

They were in the middle too that Saturday, but they didn’t know it yet.  They thought it was over, the wise teaching, the healing and the restoration of a nation.  Everything they had been living for was changed in one day.   Continue reading “Easter: Coffee, jammies and HOPE!”

Hosanna?

img_8960So Palm Sunday is typically my favorite Sunday of the whole year.  I think back to spending it with preschoolers and how we would tell them about that special day when Jesus entered Jerusalem.  Making leaves, doing a parade and shouting Hosanna!  For preschoolers, it’s the perfect lesson!  There is a lot of energy, color and activity in the re-telling of the event.  Today though I sit alone in my backyard, missing the energy of the typical Palm Sunday celebrations in church. 

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I am beginning to think though, that maybe this is how it’s supposed to be?  Instead of songs and shouts of Hosanna, I have wind and rain shouting a chorus.  And while there are no palm fronds, there are the trees in my backyard violently waving their praise!   

While this might not be the Palm Sunday you were imagining, maybe it’s just what you need?  This week as we all move toward a very different Easter, may it be a time of reflection and focus.  A time to look at life and our priorities.  To decide if what we think is important, really IS that important! 

But the wisdom from above is first of all pure.  It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others.  It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds.  It shows no favoritism and is always sincere.  James 3:17

Advent: Rejoice!

dsc_0835-2So it’s Christmas Eve and I am fighting my feelings.  I’m sitting here with my hubby on a quiet evening.  No family…. Not that normal excitement that usually comes with the season.  In some ways it seems kind of sad, but it’s just because things have changed.  Most of the boys are now with significant others and living out of town.  So we spent our “Christmas” together on Saturday, so that they would be with their ladies families on Christmas day.  It was wonderful to be together, but the new normal is taking some getting used to.  It was kind of getting me down having such a quiet Christmas Eve and anticipating the same on Christmas Day.  It didn’t help that I was going to the doctor because I wasn’t feeling well.  Really?  Is this how the holiday is supposed to be?   Continue reading “Advent: Rejoice!”

Remembering…..

What do I want to remember?

IMG_7423I want to remember that in my actions, I sow seeds. They can be seeds that lift a person up, encourage and give strength. Or they can be discouraging, defeating and used to tear down.

I may never see the fruit of those seeds, but that doesn’t mean that there won’t be a result or even a price that’s paid.

I think of those days and the men who lived here, planned and executed evil.  The seeds sown in their lives were ones that exploded in death.

What seeds could have changed that?

Continue reading “Remembering…..”

To laugh or not to laugh….

img_4462It’s Mother’s Day, and I am sitting here listening to Christmas music.  I know it’s crazy, but in some way it brings me comfort. It reminds me that there’s hope for this world.

 

 

It’s been quite a year packed with all sorts of crazy happenings, but also some of the sweetest moments.  And you know, the older I get, the more I see that it all goes hand in hand.  Life, death, pain and pleasure.  Love, fear, failure and triumph.  All these things occupy the same space at the same time, and it’s right that they do so.  It’s not always fun, but it’s the way it happens in this world.

There has been pressure this year.  With tumors, surgeries and unfortunately a lot of 16939225_10211261381504215_4523643083069843847_npain, but as Mike said the other day, “I don’t think I’ve laughed so much.”  It’s pretty weird because we typically laugh a lot!

I think this is the feeling you get when you truly feel loved.  I know about the whole “God so loved the world” thing, but I don’t think I’ve ever come as close to understanding it than I do right now.  We are loved by the Creator of all, and He is on my side.  Our side.  Even while we walk through scary times, I know that His love keeps us safe.  Things aren’t perfect, but I trust Him, and that gives me peace.  Because of that, we look to the future and laugh.  ‘Cuz it’s been mind blowing so far, and we still have a ways to go.

And for the record, I am listening to “Jazz Musicians Christmas” on Pandora….. so it’s not really like listening to Christmas music. IMG_0171Right?

 

 

A little peace….

One of my favorite parts of the Easter story is of the last supper.  I have always loved how John relays how Jesus washed their feet.  I can imagine how uncomfortable they would have been, but how relaxed by the end.  I mean really….who doesn’t love a foot massage?  

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I think of the simple task of Jesus washing and drying their feet.  These men who walk everywhere, but not with the comfortable shoes of today.  No.  They are walking many miles with leather sandals of ancient times.  Can you imagine?  Ouch!  So they are sitting there, uncomfortable in the first place with Jesus assuming the role of servant.  Then as they are willing him to finish, they start to relax and kind of enjoy the slight massage of their sore and tired feet.  Before they know it, their eyes snap open and they realize that they were in total comfort.  They lock eyes with Jesus, and I can imagine the slight smile on His face.  


I think that is how He is with our lives.  We (I) fight him when he asks us (me) to do something.  I struggle like Peter with the appropriateness of the idea, and then before I know it, I am in the middle of His will and my life is filled with His peace.  I am in total comfort, and I can imagine His eyes on me.  And that same slight smile is on His face.  

…quickly torn apart.

“Isn’t it amazing how long it takes to build something, and how quickly it can be torn apart.”

I had a sermon playing on my phone as I was pulling weeds.  It’s funny. I’ve listened to it a couple of times before but this was the first time I remember hearing the quote.   Maybe it caught my attention because of circumstances.  I tried to keep listening, but the quote kept turning in my head, so I turned it off and put on some music.

DSC_1782We’ve had so much rain lately that the weeds have taken over.  So it was past time to get out and clean them up.  They were easy to pull, as the ground is soft and the weeds were pretty big. Some of it was small and kind of reminded me of ground cover. It was more delicate and harder to pull out.  It was such a pain!  I had half a mind to let it stay, but I knew no matter what they looked like, they were still weeds.  As green as they were, I knew that it would take over and that wouldn’t be good.  Plus, it would have gotten me into huge trouble! My son worked one spring to get the area all dug out and the mulch put down, so I want to honor the work he did by keeping it cleaned out and looking good.

I think of how upset he would be if I just let it all go to the weeds.  It took him time, sweat and a lot of hard work to get it all completed.  Like the quote, he had built something that took effort, and as I looked at the mulch, I saw how easy it could be ruined.

It’s a lot like life.  Even things that are developed, worked on and cultivated can be ruined when we leave the habits, activities or even people that shouldn’t be there.

God help me to keep the weeds pulled!

Time to encourage…..

IMG_7943Timing is everything.  I’ve really been amazed at the people we’ve met over the past couple of months.  How they encouraged us, provided good care for Mike and helped us navigate the process.  One of my favorites was an older lady I met while Mike was having an MRI. This was before we had his diagnosis.  We had gotten to the office where the MRI would be done, and I can remember thinking for the first time how fragile Mike seemed.  We both got out of the car and he waited for me.  We’ve always held hands when we walked, but now it was different. We walked slower, more carefully. I was holding his hand more to help him, than simply out of affection.  When we finally got into the back, Mike went into get the MRI done, and I sat out in a small waiting area.  No one was out there with me until an older couple came back and were waiting. Ugh!  I did not want to talk to anyone!  So I kept looking straight ahead and did all I could not to make eye contact. When the man was called back, I was doing great, keeping my eyes to myself and not attracting any attention. Well, that was until I started laughing.

I mean it wasn’t my fault!  It was the technician that was taking people back. So he finishes up with a patient, and tells him he can go.  Right at that time a doctor comes up and wants to talk to the technician, so he tells the patient to just sit down.  The patient, confused now that he is getting two different sets of instructions, stands there unsure of what to do?  When the doctor steps away, the technician sees the poor man and asks why he is still there? The patient says “well the doctor told me to sit,” and the tech just says, “what does he know, he’s only a doctor?” The patient then leaves, and I start cracking up watching this play out in front of me.  I then made my mistake, and made eye contact with the lady that was sitting there.  When I relayed why I was laughing, she couldn’t hear me, so of course I had to sit next to her and share the story.  By that time it was all over, I was trapped into a conversation that I didn’t want.  For that, I am so grateful!

IMG_0143So we talked, or at least I listened while she talked.  She shared a lot of her life in just a few minutes.  We also got to talking about her moving into a new “adult community” and her fears of finding a place with the new people she would meet.  We also talked about her son, and the new woman in his life.  She had liked her, was impressed with her education and intelligence, but was unsure because she had tattoos.  She was a good Catholic lady, and this seemed to bug her a lot.  So I did what I do best, and told her what I had learned along the way.  Encouraging her to remember the times she had been the new person in the past, and how she had found a place then.  I told her that this would be the same, and not to worry.  I also told her about my own son and his many tattoos.  She seemed to be comforted by the words and my own experiences.  It was a great conversation, distracting for me and encouraging for her!

By the time my hubby was coming out where we were waiting, she was giving me a hug goodbye and telling me she “loved me”.  She was adorable, and it was such a fun conversation!  Mike asked who she was, and I told him that we had just met.  He just gave me a look?  That was a moment though that I just thanked God for perspective.  It was the last time I would try to cut myself off from the people around me.  I realized that God may have put them in my path to help me cope. Even more important, God may have put me in their path for the exact same reason.

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