Search

Cheryl Mendoza

How He speaks to me…..Or… can't He just call my cell when He wants to talk?

Tag

lent

Time to encourage…..

IMG_7943Timing is everything.  I’ve really been amazed at the people we’ve met over the past couple of months.  How they encouraged us, provided good care for Mike and helped us navigate the process.  One of my favorites was an older lady I met while Mike was having an MRI. This was before we had his diagnosis.  We had gotten to the office where the MRI would be done, and I can remember thinking for the first time how fragile Mike seemed.  We both got out of the car and he waited for me.  We’ve always held hands when we walked, but now it was different. We walked slower, more carefully. I was holding his hand more to help him, than simply out of affection.  When we finally got into the back, Mike went into get the MRI done, and I sat out in a small waiting area.  No one was out there with me until an older couple came back and were waiting. Ugh!  I did not want to talk to anyone!  So I kept looking straight ahead and did all I could not to make eye contact. When the man was called back, I was doing great, keeping my eyes to myself and not attracting any attention. Well, that was until I started laughing.

I mean it wasn’t my fault!  It was the technician that was taking people back. So he finishes up with a patient, and tells him he can go.  Right at that time a doctor comes up and wants to talk to the technician, so he tells the patient to just sit down.  The patient, confused now that he is getting two different sets of instructions, stands there unsure of what to do?  When the doctor steps away, the technician sees the poor man and asks why he is still there? The patient says “well the doctor told me to sit,” and the tech just says, “what does he know, he’s only a doctor?” The patient then leaves, and I start cracking up watching this play out in front of me.  I then made my mistake, and made eye contact with the lady that was sitting there.  When I relayed why I was laughing, she couldn’t hear me, so of course I had to sit next to her and share the story.  By that time it was all over, I was trapped into a conversation that I didn’t want.  For that, I am so grateful!

IMG_0143So we talked, or at least I listened while she talked.  She shared a lot of her life in just a few minutes.  We also got to talking about her moving into a new “adult community” and her fears of finding a place with the new people she would meet.  We also talked about her son, and the new woman in his life.  She had liked her, was impressed with her education and intelligence, but was unsure because she had tattoos.  She was a good Catholic lady, and this seemed to bug her a lot.  So I did what I do best, and told her what I had learned along the way.  Encouraging her to remember the times she had been the new person in the past, and how she had found a place then.  I told her that this would be the same, and not to worry.  I also told her about my own son and his many tattoos.  She seemed to be comforted by the words and my own experiences.  It was a great conversation, distracting for me and encouraging for her!

By the time my hubby was coming out where we were waiting, she was giving me a hug goodbye and telling me she “loved me”.  She was adorable, and it was such a fun conversation!  Mike asked who she was, and I told him that we had just met.  He just gave me a look?  That was a moment though that I just thanked God for perspective.  It was the last time I would try to cut myself off from the people around me.  I realized that God may have put them in my path to help me cope. Even more important, God may have put me in their path for the exact same reason.

Laughing all the way to the…hospital?

whiskey-typewriter-shutterstock-570x380So day 2 is always hard.  I always wonder, what will I write about now?  I also feel behind the eight ball because I am tired. Taking care of someone can be tiring. Part of it is physical, but it’s also a mental tired.  Since I tend to overthink things, I am sure that is a lot of it!  There is a spiritual aspect to it too.  The word “spiritual” makes it sound very serious, but it really hasn’t felt that way.

The spiritual in our journey has included a lot of laughter.  Just to give you a little background, my hubby started having headaches that progressively became worse over the last half of 2018.  He never really had headaches as a rule, so we felt that something was up.  He started missing out on work, and it was really affecting how he was able to live his life.  To see him get weaker and become a bit like a little old man, it was hard to watch.  So you can imagine the excitement when we had a diagnosis.  A brain tumor?  All right! And he can have surgery? Fantastic!

red ribbon on brown cardboard box
Photo by Negative Space on Pexels.com

I can remember watching his face as he talked with the doctor that Saturday morning.  It lit up like Christmas!  We had just been given a present.  It was hope!  With that hope, what was ahead held no concern. We knew that it was all out of our hands, so we rested in those who took care of him.  The nurses, doctors and God.

 

At some point I thought of the verse that is quoted so often, “peace that passes all understanding.”  At that point I totally got it.  I mean really, brain surgery?  This is serious stuff, but we wanted it!  We had peace though, and I really didn’t understand how we could be feeling that way?  I didn’t argue though, it was a place I was glad to be.

IMG_7989The neurologist gave us an idea to fastrack the whole thing.  So he called a doctor at the local emergency room to get us in.  My hubby was so excited, we would go to the ER and they would transfer us to a larger hospital.  It would be there that they would see the big mass in his head and they may even do surgery this weekend.  Isn’t it great?  There was not one tear, one moment of hesitation or fear.  We looked at each other shook our heads with smiles on our faces.

It wasn’t long till we got ready and were walking up to the emergency room.  Before we got in I asked my hubby, “who are we supposed to see?”  He looked at me with a smile and said, “Doctor Martin.” When I heard that we both started laughing and I knew it was going to be all right.    Doc Martin is a TV show we watch, and the doctor is such a character!  And of course as soon as the doctor came in we had to greet him as “Doc Martin.”  The doctor laughed…..he knew exactly who we were talking about!  I always knew God had a great sense of humor and today He proved it again!

How did I get here?

IMG_0171Today is the start of the Lenten season, and in the past couple of years, I’ve come to really love it!  I almost missed the beginning, since we have been a little busy around our house.  My hubby reminded me yesterday was Fat Tuesday, and its kind of become a tradition to have red beans and rice for dinner.  I am glad that we didn’t miss it because we needed a little fun this week, and I needed a little reminder of what Lent means to me.

Not being Catholic, Lent is something that I’ve adopted as an adult. I typically don’t give anything up, cuz that just didn’t seem right for me.   What I try to do is write daily and this year is no different.  It seems like the perfect time to process all the things that have been going on in my life and in the lives around me.  Since December, our world has been knocked off its axis. What with my hubby’s tumor diagnosis and even some upheaval at the church I attend, chaos has entered places where I had felt pretty darn safe.  The funny thing is, while I should have felt fear, I have only felt peace.  Like I told a friend today, “I am not sure how it works, but all I can do is point to God and say it’s all Him!”

So for the next 40 days I am going to try my best to listen and write.  To try and see how we got here, how God is getting us through and look into the future to see where He may lead us next on this crazy journey!

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑