Encouragement

Of Fall and Friends

I was not sure why I looked, but I did. It may be because it is fall. I know, most people just get a pumpkin spice latte, but not me. I become nostalgic. It might have been because yesterday was such a sucky day. I slept badly, and did not write till late in the afternoon. Which means that all the crap that makes my head, spin was not written out and discarded. It just kept rolling around in my mind till it was ready to burst. Yesterday afternoon though, I was able to get out, grab some chai and “throw up” for lack of a better term. I just write down everything in my head and see if I can use any of what is there.

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For some reason this morning, I did not go back to it. I was feeling nostalgic again and so I did look up some information on my elementary school. I was trying to picture people and some of the things that shape my memories. It was then that I looked. In this day and age of the internet you can find just about anyone, or at least some bit of an electronic trace. So during childhood I had many friends on and off, and I still keep in touch with a few. There is one though, that I truly lost touch with. We met during elementary school, continued through Junior high and into the beginning of high school. At some point, we grew apart?

115847-113843 Today for some reason, I Googled her name. OK, so I looked her up through Yahoo, whatever! When her name
came up, so did a lot of pictures. Some were of other people, but then I saw her face. Older, with darker hair but beautiful. I looked into the face of a person that I remember with fondness, I looked into the face of a person that I loved. Now get your minds out of the gutter, not that kind of love. The kind of love you have for a family member that, even though you haven’t seen them for a while, you feel like they had never left your side.

So what do you do when you find someone on the internet? You of course cyber stalk them. Do not get the wrong idea, I was not going to camp out at her house or anything. I went and looked in the usual places for information, FaceBook and Twitter. I looked for pictures of her, of her family, any information as to where she lived and what she was doing after all these years. It was exciting to see that she is an actress. It was something that made sense, in relation to the girl I once knew. I guess the tap, jazz, acrobat and Hawaiian dance lessons had paid off for her. I always laughed when she went through the litany of dance classes she had taken, and even with what I listed, I am probably still missing some of them. As you can imagine, I was a more than a little envious of her training.

autism-puzzle-piece-clip-art-cliparts-co-lilgLt-clipart It makes me happy to know that she is well. I remember long conversations when we were younger, but I don’t remember the details. I cannot put my finger on the why, all I know is what my heart tells me. All I know is that finding out this new information, is like a piece of a puzzle. It all seems to fit. I love fall and the thoughts of old friends.

September 3, 2016 1

Influencing faith?

Ok…so there is some crazy things about this whole writing gig. I have a love hate relationship with it. I love when I am done. When I feel like what I wanted to say is clear, it honors God and is not too embarrassing about myself. If I hit all three of whiskey-typewriter-shutterstock-570x380
those criteria, I am ecstatic. I feel like I am doing what God is calling me to do. To make it even better, if I can get a catchy last line to sum it all up, I treat myself to some ice cream. When I am working through something though, I cannot stand it. Maybe this is why some writers drink so much? Maybe I should skip the ice cream and move on to scotch? No.

At first, I am typically inspired by something that happens, but as I continue to write, I feel inept, unsure and have no idea why God is calling me to write anything? It is weird. It is why I try to write as fast as I can, so that I can finish it quickly while I still feel the excitement of that first discovery. how-often-blog-why-blogging-writing-ideas Well today I was not so much inspired, but compelled. You see I was cruising my FaceBook, cuz ya know I have the dreaded disease, FOMO. Fear of missing out. So instead of just attacking my lap top to write I start scrolling, and at times it stresses me out. So why do I do it? FOMO. Anyway, I was reading a post by a blogger, who was talking about a Christian blogger who had posted that she was separating from her spouse. OK, so that is guaranteed to get my attention. Neither of these bloggers are anyone that I “follow”(man I hate that term) but I know I have read posts by them before. So because I am like a cat, totally curious, I went to the post where she announces her separation to see what she wrote. OK, to tell you the truth, I just skimmed it. She is not someone that I know personally or follow, so her decision does not produce any other emotion than just heart break for her situation. What I did think was ironic is her new book that was just being released. It was about her marriage, the problems they had and how they have walked through it. It was then I wondered about the influence she hoped to have with women, and how this new turn in her story affected that?

I really wondered about this whole online community thing, especially since I am trying to wiggle my way into it. Is it a good way to influence people? Is it bad? I am not sure what the answers are to the questions, but it reminded me of how I want my online presence to be perceived. I am not here to tell people what to do, or even what I think God is telling them to do. There is more than enough of that already. (My hubby and kids can ignore this part, I am so totally here to tell them what to do) I am not here to say that I have the answers to any aspect of life. All I am here to do is relay what God is teaching me. That being a Christian can look pretty messy, but it is a lovely mess. I am here to tell my story, and the simple ways that God speaks to me in my boring everyday life. It is a glimpse of what faith looks like for me, but it is not necessarily a template for what it should look like for you. What I am thankful for most in my life, is what I want to encourage everyone to seek. Their own faith. God is good, and if you seek Him you better believe you are going to find Him. Just don’t be shocked by where He might show up.

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If you agree, disagree, I have irritated you or made you think, leave me a comment. I would be interested to hear any feedback on the topic or how it was written. Thanks!

August 31, 2016 1

Holding on…

“I will not let you go unless you bless me.” Genesis 32:26b

These past few weeks I have been watching a lot of the Olympics. I have not sat down for long stretches of time, but if I was able to catch a few minutes, I did. One of those times included watching the end of a wrestling match between Russia and Uzbekistan. At the end of the match, the Uzbek athlete lost, and proceeded to lay in the middle of the mat inconsolable. The referee or umpire or whatever they are called in wrestling, stood there offering a hand that was ignored. Finally, after what seemed a long time, he got up and stood there as the other athlete was called the winner. I made note of his actions, and didn’t think of them again until today.

I have been listening to a sermon podcast from church, and that is what brought the wrestler back to mind. Why? Well, after listening to this sermon, I really could relate to the guy on the mat. It was like if he stayed on the mat, then the match wasn’t really over. As he laid there, I wondered what was going through his mind? Maybe he was wrestling with his own emotions and thoughts. Then when he could bear the outcome, he was finally able to get up. It gave me a better picture of the story of Jacob and the night he wrestled with God. Even better than that, the whole story seemed to give me a better picture of my own wrestling with God.

Here is the quick rundown. Esau and Jacob were brothers, and Esau being the oldest was in line for the birthright and blessing from his father. These two brothers had two different mothers so there were a whole bunch of dysfunctional family dynamics going on. What winds up happening is that Jacob manipulates the situation and steals both the birthright and blessing. At that point Esau is mad as all get out and vows to kill his brother, so Jacob runs away.

While Jacob is gone, God guides him and blesses him, but It is not always pretty. He gets conned by his father in law, Laban. Then he is able to do some conning of his own, since he had been taken advantage of. God eventually tells him to return home, back to the land of his father and grandfather, where God promises to be with him. Jacob is now husband to two wives, baby daddy to two servants and father to many children. He came home very wealthy as he had flocks of many animals and lots of servants.

One thing he did not have was the knowledge of what waited for him at home. Would Esau welcome him? Would he still be calling for Jacobs blood? Jacob was terrified. So what does he do? Well he reminds God of all the promises that He made to Jacob and his family. The one’s where God said He would protect Jacob if he returned home, and that He would multiply Jacob’s descendants until they were as many as the sand on the beach. So Jacob then slept peacefully reminded of all God’s promises, right? Continue reading “Holding on…” →

August 26, 2016 0

Summer’s end

I think we can say that the summer is officially over. We have just returned home from a long weekend at Lake Shasta. It was a great time, and we saw family who we had not seen in a while. It is always great to see everyone, spend some time catching up and sharing a lot of laughs. We even drove a little ways up the highway to see Mt. Shasta, but the pictures my hubby took were a little hazy. Visibility is bad as there is smoke in the air all up and down California due to various fires. Since I hate the highways and my husband cannot go in a straight line, we took many backroads and explored a little. It took us longer, but the lack of traffic made it a much more enjoyable trip.

We visited the now defunct Rancho Seco Nuclear power plant outside of Sacramento. I love that it is now surrounded by solar panels.

We then split up in Sacramento and hit two museums at a time. My husband went to the California State Railroad museum, and my son and I went to the California Automobile Museum. Geno was in seventh heaven!

We stayed at a wonderful little place called Salt Creek Resort. It was small, but it was a great place.The cabins had everything we needed, all we had to do was bring some bedding and food. The whole place was taken up by family, so it was a fantastic weekend full of food, wine and laughter. And our view of the trestle crossing the lake, was the best spot to sit in the morning. Summer is officially over, and I can’t think of a more perfect way to end it!!

August 22, 2016 0

I was there once too

So as I was sitting here, thinking about what I wanted to write and I felt frustration. What is this blog for? Maybe it is a blog where I have a million followers and I can actually make a living off of it. Or maybe it is a platform where the lessons I learn are shared, and sought out. Where I write a book that encourages young women, moms, older gals, single ladies and such to seek God and use their gifts to take over the…I mean change the world.

I am not a mommy blogger. My youngest son just turned eighteen, but really has not wanted me to be his mom since he was in Kindergarten. He was the most independent child in a line of four independent boys. I was never a mom that was very involved, and the teachers did not know me by my first name. Don’t get me wrong, those moms are amazing, I was just not one of them.

Am I a Christian blogger? I write a lot about my own faith journey. Sometimes I think it is too serious or boring, and I feel like I am a lot funnier in person. Or at least I think so? So I have been thinking about my “voice” a lot lately. Who am I speaking to? Is it the working woman, the mom, the Christian, the unbeliever, the failure, the dreamer or is it to all of the above?

When you don’t have a particular niche it seems hard to me. No one seems to zero in on a blog where it just talks about… whatever? So what do I know? Well, it is that I am a story teller and an encourager. So I guess I will just end this with a story.

One afternoon I was home with the kids and I went into the kitchen at one point, and saw smoke pouring into that room. I immediately turned around, grabbed all the children, the phone and went outside to call the fire department. It was mostly smoke, and it only caused surface damage, so we were very blessed. Come to find out that our seven year old son lit some matches in the garage next to a mattress. He had only been in the garage for a few minutes, as I had just rounded him up because he was not allowed to play in there. I just did not catch him fast enough. The matches had smoldered and eventually produced a bunch of smoke and a small amount of flame. It was so disheartening to me. My son was a bit of a handful. He always ran everywhere, he never walked. He was always active and had already started to have some trouble with school work. Don’t get me wrong, he did have things going for him. He was always helpful, kind, worked hard, and always had a great attitude.

Well you can imagine, the stress level we had. We were worried about this little guy and how life was going to deal with him. It was one day not too long after the fire when I had a conversation with a pastor at our church. He was in charge of all of our missions at the church, and at that time it was a rather large program. He stopped me though and told me a little about himself. So here was this very well respected pastor, who I totally thought was a wonderful man, and he was telling me what a stinker he was as a child. He said that he had done things like that when he was young too. He encouraged me that my son would grow out of it, that he would do just fine. When I looked at him, I felt hope. If he was a handful as a child, could get through it and be successful, well then so could my son. I am so grateful for the conversation and the encouragement. He also was right. My son did make it through his childhood, not perfectly, and with many struggles. He is still a hard worker, kind and willing to help if he is able. His family means everything to him, and he is an optimistic and encouraging person. Perfect? No. Best trait of all? He is over the whole setting things on fire stage, and now he puts them out. He spends his summers fighting wildfires throughout California. So all of that energy and activity that drove us crazy as a kid, now helps him do his job well.

I think of the women like me who are out there, dealing with crazy little kids in their lives. I just want to tell you, have faith. You can do this and they will make it. I know….I was there once too. Thankful not to be there any longer!

August 18, 2016 0

Cooling off in Cambria

So we had to go to Paso Robles yesterday evening for a concert, and since it was just as hot there as it was here (100+) we decided to hit the coast first. I could not be more thankful for the detour. We left temperatures in the 90’s and arrived at the coast to fog and high 60’s. I got to put on a sweatshirt and everything! Since I was with the shutterbug hubby, I decided to bring my little camera and follow his lead. These are a few of my favorite shots.

NMS_0318 — Moonstone Beach. All these rocks are a natural exfoliant. So much nicer to walk on than sand.

Continue reading “Cooling off in Cambria” →

July 27, 2016 2

Stranger things to post….

So I started watching a Netflix program yesterday called Stranger Things. It is one of those original series that they now produce, and I have to admit, I am totally hooked. It is a suspenseful, horror, sci fi kind of series. So basically, stuff I don’t tend to watch. I like suspense, but I stay away from horror, because it is not good for me. This one though had me hooked quickly, and I couldn’t figure out why? I wondered if it was because I so totally related to the setting. It is set in 1980, so I feel like I am looking at my childhood. (or at least Jr. High) The clothes, bikes, cars, homes, music and TV were all so familiar to me. I looked at clothes that I probably wore, and hairstyles that I totally had. In the show, I was in a setting that made so much sense to me. Not like Sesame Street. I know you are thinking, Sesame Street? How did we get here? Continue reading “Stranger things to post….” →

July 19, 2016 1

Right time, right place.

Today was a day of encouragement. Some of it I gave, and some of it I received. The events were nothing spectacular, but it is typically the small things that can have the most impact. This morning, I went to the grocery store, and by the time I came out, my car was in the shade. It was a simple thing, but in the heat of the Central Valley, it provided welcome relief even from this morning’s heat.

When I came home, I had to hurry and get cleaned up, as I had a massage appointment to get to. It was only twenty minutes, but after the stress that I put myself through this week, it was like a little slice of heaven. This week my regular therapist was back from a maternity sabbatical, and I was happy to see her. After my massage, we sat and talked for a few minutes. First she gave me the update about the new baby and the challenges of being a new mom. I told her some of my experiences with the boys, and encouraged her to use her own good sense to make decisions. I advised her to not worry about what other people say she should do, but to take the advice and use her best judgement. I then told her that I had quit my job, and that I was working at blogging and trying to “reinvent” myself. It was then that she was able to give some encouraging words to me. It was a great conversation, and I left feeling better in both body and spirit. Continue reading “Right time, right place.” →

July 17, 2016 0

Tap dance as life.

Viva La Revolution!! And I do not mean some kind of violent upheaval, I mean the spinning around till you get back to the start. That is where I am today, back to getting some tapping done. I am trying to be mindful of everything that is going on in the world, but life goes on. And isn’t that why we continue to address the same issues? Life must go on. I have to work, pay bills, care for my family, exercise, eat right and try to encourage/instruct my children. (still!!)

I was tapping this morning (yikes) and I found that one step was really hard for me, because of one little problem. I was having a hard time with my weight on my heel and bringing my other foot off the floor. It was all a matter of balance. I felt awkward and terribly clumsy, but kept working on it. After thinking it through, watching the video and practicing that one part repeatedly it finally felt better. It probably did not look perfect, but it did feel a little more natural. Continue reading “Tap dance as life.” →

July 13, 2016 1

Cheryl Mendoza

How He speaks to me…..Or… can't He just call my cell when He wants to talk?

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