So it was a rough day for the General. On June 15th the Continental Congress had made him the Commander of the Army, and on July 3rd he formally took command. So after a few days of issuing mostly administrative General Orders, today he is tasked with something a little more heavy.
You see, the battle of Bunker Hill had been in June, and during the battle there was a blatant example of cowardice. Three men were brought up on charges, but just one was found guilty. All of this had happened before Washington came on the scene, but the sentencing was left for him to deal with. After reviewing the court martial information, the General agrees with the sentencing and dismisses Captain John Callender from the Continental Army. In the general order from this day, Washington speaks his thoughts on the dangers of cowardice.
“It is with inexpressible Concern that the General upon his first Arrival in the army, should find an Officer sentenced by a General Court Martial to be cashier’d for Cowardice—A Crime of all others, the most infamous in a Soldier, the most injurious to an Army, and the last to be forgiven; inasmuch as it may, and often does happen, that the Cowardice of a single Officer may prove the Distruction of the whole Army:“
So while Captain Callender was dismissed, John Callender was not done with the army. The general’s order had some interesting wording…..
“Capt. John Callender is accordingly cashiered and dismissd from all farther service in the Continental Army as an Officer.“
“….as an Officer.” That small phrase made all the difference. You see, while John could not be an officer, he was able to rejoin the Continental Army as an enlisted man. He rejoins a volunteer artillery company, and while this is out of our timeline, he does show heroism during the battle of Long Island. In March of 1776, his unit is under attack and some even start to break under the assault. Callender assumes command and by the “force of his example” rallies the men. While they are still overtaken, his bravery catches the attention of a British officer who spares his life, and takes him as a prisoner of war. The story of his bravery was relayed to Washington, who upon hearing was moved to strike the court martial from the record, reinstate his rank and arrange for his release. I was so surprised by this outcome and I just couldn’t wrap my mind around “why”? Why did he run during the battle of Bunker Hill but acted so bravely at Long Island? I tried looking for something written or spoken by him to see what his motivation was, but I unfortunately didn’t find anything.
What it did remind me of is something I’ve come to believe is very important for my life…. It’s not how you start, but how you finish. He didn’t start off very well, but he certainly turned it around. Captain Callender seemed to make the choice to humble himself by signing up as a lowly private, and didn’t even try to hide his unsavory story. He just mustered his courage and served his country and in these days it gives me hope. Hope that if he can, so can I.
https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Washington/03-01-02-0040
Now that it’s (mostly) behind us, we are looking forward to the new year more than we typically do. Mike is looking forward to regaining strength and feeling more like his normal self. I am looking forward to …. well I am not sure what? Don’t get me wrong… for Mike I am praying for excellent recovery, and for the boys that they would continue to make strides forward in their lives. Above all that they…….that we all would be able to know God’s presence. But while I felt foreboding last year, I am not sure what I feel this December 31st? It’s definitely not the same heaviness as last year, but it’s also not the normal New Years day feeling. 
So it’s Christmas Eve and I am fighting my feelings.
Timing is everything. I’ve really been amazed at the people we’ve met over the past couple of months. How they encouraged us, provided good care for Mike and helped us navigate the process. One of my favorites was an older lady I met while Mike was having an MRI. This was before we had his diagnosis. We had gotten to the office where the MRI would be done, and I can remember thinking for the first time how fragile Mike seemed. We both got out of the car and he waited for me. We’ve always held hands when we walked, but now it was different. We walked slower, more carefully. I was holding his hand more to help him, than simply out of affection. When we finally got into the back, Mike went into get the MRI done, and I sat out in a small waiting area. No one was out there with me until an older couple came back and were waiting. Ugh! I did not want to talk to anyone! So I kept looking straight ahead and did all I could not to make eye contact. When the man was called back, I was doing great, keeping my eyes to myself and not attracting any attention. Well, that was until I started laughing.
So we talked, or at least I listened while she talked. She shared a lot of her life in just a few minutes. We also got to talking about her moving into a new “adult community” and her fears of finding a place with the new people she would meet. We also talked about her son, and the new woman in his life. She had liked her, was impressed with her education and intelligence, but was unsure because she had tattoos. She was a good Catholic lady, and this seemed to bug her a lot. So I did what I do best, and told her what I had learned along the way. Encouraging her to remember the times she had been the new person in the past, and how she had found a place then. I told her that this would be the same, and not to worry. I also told her about my own son and his many tattoos. She seemed to be comforted by the words and my own experiences. It was a great conversation, distracting for me and encouraging for her!
So day 2 is always hard. I always wonder, what will I write about now? I also feel behind the eight ball because I am tired. Taking care of someone can be tiring. Part of it is physical, but it’s also a mental tired. Since I tend to overthink things, I am sure that is a lot of it! There is a spiritual aspect to it too. The word “spiritual” makes it sound very serious, but it really hasn’t felt that way.
The neurologist gave us an idea to fastrack the whole thing. So he called a doctor at the local emergency room to get us in. My hubby was so excited, we would go to the ER and they would transfer us to a larger hospital. It would be there that they would see the big mass in his head and they may even do surgery this weekend. Isn’t it great? There was not one tear, one moment of hesitation or fear. We looked at each other shook our heads with smiles on our faces.
Today is the start of the Lenten season, and in the past couple of years, I’ve come to really love it! I almost missed the beginning, since we have been a little busy around our house. My hubby reminded me yesterday was Fat Tuesday, and its kind of become a tradition to have red beans and rice for dinner. I am glad that we didn’t miss it because we needed a little fun this week, and I needed a little reminder of what Lent means to me.
wondered if this would be my last post for 2018 or actually be the first of 2019? I have plenty of time to make it before the new year, but I don’t seem to be very focused. Like other times when I am writing, I seem to have a hard time starting. If I can get my brain to relax and just type, then I can actually get something done.
I was able to talk to my oldest son for a while last night. We stood outside beneath the stars, wondering at the beauty of the night sky. We talked of the new year and the feeling that something was coming. It was a bit foreboding, but we both agreed that no matter if it’s good or bad in store, God would have our backs.
Cheryl Mendoza 