I was able to talk to my oldest son for a while last night. We stood outside beneath the stars, wondering at the beauty of the night sky. We talked of the new year and the feeling that something was coming. It was a bit foreboding, but we both agreed that no matter if it’s good or bad in store, God would have our backs.
Those were the words I wrote on December 31, 2018, and how prophetic they would turn out to be. So in the few weeks following, my hubby endured more pain, doctor visits and the diagnosis that would change everything. Brain tumor. Even now when we hear the words we shake our heads in disbelief and laugh.
Now that it’s (mostly) behind us, we are looking forward to the new year more than we typically do. Mike is looking forward to regaining strength and feeling more like his normal self. I am looking forward to …. well I am not sure what? Don’t get me wrong… for Mike I am praying for excellent recovery, and for the boys that they would continue to make strides forward in their lives. Above all that they…….that we all would be able to know God’s presence. But while I felt foreboding last year, I am not sure what I feel this December 31st? It’s definitely not the same heaviness as last year, but it’s also not the normal New Years day feeling.
Today seemed to reflect the turmoil in my head, as it was probably the worst fog day of the year. Thankfully there was only a little traffic, so I took it slowly and the drive to work was no problem. The good thing about my drive is that I know where I am going, and even though I can’t see well I can use that knowledge to drive safely.
I guess the same could be said about the new year. While I can’t see or know what people, events or experiences will be a part of 2020, I guess I’ll be using 2019 as the example to help me navigate what may be coming next. So what helped me in 2019 that is worth remembering?
George Michael’s advice that you “Gotta have Faith”, an old sermon telling me to “Look up”, a new sermon reminding me that “He’s got the whole world in HIs hands” and the promise in the Lord’s Prayer to “give us this day our daily bread”.
These are the things that kept coming to my mind during the year, and they gave me hope. And that hope gave me strength, for whatever I needed to face each day. For this year….. well I guess I’ll be remembering those things, but it seems like God is already helping me with new inspiration. It all started with the eagles. No not the band, but the bald kind.
As Mike and I travelled this past weekend, for the first time, I saw a bald eagle in the wild. (OK… it’s strange to call California “wild” but it’s appropriate as we were out in the middle of nowhere) We took it as a good sign. Well, that was on Thursday……on Saturday, when we saw two more in a totally different area of the state, I could only wonder what God was trying to say?
It was then I remembered….. But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. Ahhhh…. a reminder of who I can trust.
And in trusting God, He’s made us a promise. That no matter what’s next in the new year, He will provide the strength to do more than keep us going, but to help us soar!