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Cheryl Mendoza

How He speaks to me…..Or… can't He just call my cell when He wants to talk?

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Women

A Study in Pink

So how do you keep a group of 5 and 6 year olds under control?  You ask them a question, and let them all take turns answering.  So what was the question?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

bb73ca0e95c8c25876df1f408c0afb0dAs I called on the kids and got various answers, I heard something curious from our girls.  They tended to follow what their friends wanted to do.  Our first girl wanted to be a mermaid, and all of a sudden we had five who wanted to be mermaids.  The interesting thing was when other professions were brought up, some changed their mind and many of them chose to be something different.   Oh except for the one who wanted to be a doctor AND a mermaid.

It got me thinking…. Not so much about these young ones, but about the young women in our area.  Do they know the thousands of opportunities that are in their own future?   Many moons ago, I know I didn’t!

That is where a “Study in Pink” comes in.  It was something that I thought would be fun to explore.  Women of all ages, backgrounds and the different types of work they do.  To showcase the possibilities that are out there!

So I hope you join me and Mike, (who will be playing Jimmy Olsen to my Lois Lane) as we set out to uncover the many shades in this “Study in Pink”. Continue reading “A Study in Pink” →

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What’s the moral?

UnknownOnce there was a woman, and she had gotten her feelings hurt.  Nothing too bad, but the unkindness hit her especially hard at that time.  Maybe she was feeling a little vulnerable.  Anyway, the more she tried to analyze the situation, (sound like anyone you know?) she decided that the only thing she could really do was pray for them.  She did that, not because she was so smart, but because the hurt was taking over her mind.  She knew the person was probably tired, and under some stress.  She also knew that the reaction she had received was not normal for them.  It was then that she thought, better me than someone else who maybe wouldn’t be able to let go of the hurt. Continue reading “What’s the moral?” →

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Actions v. Words – Mixed messages?

images-1So I was trolling FaceBook the other day and saw a post that was shared by one of my friends.  An author, Lysa TerKeurst, had come across a quote that she said had challenged her.  The quote, “who you are speaks so loudly, I can barely hear what you’re saying”, had her thinking about how our actions speak louder than words.

I totally agree, but…..  That does not let us off the hook for what we say.  There has to be a balance between the two.  I wrote the other day about how my Great-Grandmother taught me to love.  The way I learned from her, was by how she treated all of us.  I am still learning from her.  I look back at her life and I see that her actions spoke so much louder than words.  Wait though, what I think is so amazing is that her words never contradicted her actions. Continue reading “Actions v. Words – Mixed messages?” →

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Only passing through…

I saw a tweet the other day by Christine Caine; “Don’t get stuck somewhere you should only be passing through.”

It immediately struck a chord with me, because that is a fear of mine.  Here I am trying to become a serious, or at least a somewhat serious writer, but will that truly ever happen for me?  Will I ever be able to write something that makes people think, or something that speaks truth into their lives?  That encourages them or even makes them laugh?  I have no idea, but the path I am on means that I am at least going to try.    There is a fear though, that I will get discouraged and stop putting myself out there.  Why? Well, because I have done that before.  I might get sidetracked, and yes I have been there too.  It reminded me of a favorite bible character that I have.

You see, he took his family out of the place that they had been living.  That place was Ur.  The story says that they were traveling to Canaan but they stopped at Haran and settled there.  No friends, this is not about Abraham, but of his father Terah.

Why did the tweet lead me to this man?  Well I will tell you.  I know I am taking a little license, but it seems to make sense to me.  I imagine that God may have told Terah to go to Canaan.  Maybe this whole story of God calling out a people was going to start, not with Abraham, but with his father?   Maybe, for whatever reason, he stopped in Haran and never got to the place where God had called him.

Are my assumptions true?  I have no idea, but I still look to Terah as an example of what I do not want to be.  He was on his way to a destination, and got sidetracked.  The why’s and how’s are unknown, but what we do know is that he never got there.  That is not how I want to be, but I fear that is how I will be.  I see the path, but I don’t really know where I will end up.  It scares me, because it means trying to be successful at something that is very subjective. Truthfully, you all may find out how really very stupid I am.  Or at least, that is the fear.

Well since I am not supposed to be “fearing” anything, per my pastor last week, I guess I will stick to the path.  Truthfully, I really don’t want to miss out on what may be at the end of the journey.  I really don’t want to be Terah.  I want to make it to the place where God calls me.  Like the quote that started all of this, I don’t want to get stuck somewhere I should only be passing through.

 

 

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Ready for my close up….

img_4817I have a new office.  Well, it is actually one of the same old bedrooms in our house, but we have given it a major overhaul.  It has been cleaned and painted from top to bottom, adorned with a new desk, rug and drapes.  The things that were in this room are coming back in one at a time.  With each item, I am taking the time to see if I truly need it or not.  This room had previously housed our computer, desk and other “office” stuff.  It had also become a catch all for everything else.  When that happened, it became a room that I did not like.  There were things in the room that did not belong, and other things that needed to be addressed, but could be ignored because they were hidden in the chaos.

 

As I sit here enjoying the fruits of my hard work, I know the room is a metaphor for my life.  Every so often, God sharpens my vision and gives me a clearer view into my heart.  He lets me see the mess that has accumulated and not only does He give me the desire to clean it up, He gives me the ability to do it.  How do I make this connection between this room make-over and my life?  Well it has to do with two things.  Provision and insecurity.  These are two fears are the stumbling blocks in my life, but with each new day, God is giving me the will and the way to overcome them. Continue reading “Ready for my close up….” →

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Choose to Influence

influence-graphic-300x169“10 Historical Records That Tell Another Side of Bible Stories”, was the name of the article that showed up in my Yahoo news feed this morning. The article went through ten Bible stories, and matched them with some historical accounts that were written by non-biblical sources.  The one that caught my eye was the story of Esther, and the historical account of the man most likely that was her husband, King Xerxes I of Persia.

What do you wish? Whatever it is, I will give it to you, even if it is half of my kingdom!” Esther 7:2 NLT

When Esther goes in to see the king, she is greeted warmly and he is delighted to see her.  How do we know?  Well, it is because he says that he will “give her anything up to half of the kingdom.”  So I think we can safely assume that he was glad she was there.  As her story goes, she asks him to a banquet, where there will be a guest list of three.  Her intention is to use her influence to save her people.  After the banquet, she invites him to another with the same three attendees, the king, herself and her enemy Haman.

When she had shown care, kindness and hospitality to not only her husband but her enemy also, the king asks her again “What is your request? I will give it to you, even if it is half the kingdom!”  Talk about influence!  It was then our story comes to its conclusion.  Queen Esther unmasks Haman’s cruel plot to kill all of the Jews and the King is outraged.  Long story short, Haman is executed and the Jewish people are safe.

As I read the story, I thought about the position of influence God had given her, and how she used it for good.  My morning thoughts did not stop there though.  The King’s statement sounded familiar, like I had heard it somewhere else.  I looked and confirmed that there is another record in the bible where another person had said pretty much the same thing.  Where influence was used, but the outcome was markedly different.

“Ask me for anything you like,” the king vowed, “even half of my kingdom, and I will give it to you!”  Mark 6:23 NLT

 

Now these words were spoken by King Herod.  He too was at a banquet, but this one was very different from the one Esther had given. There were many people attending, and that included Queen Herodias and her daughter.  It is written that at this banquet, the daughter performed a dance that greatly pleased Herod.  When she was done, Herod told her to make her request known.

Again, another woman, another banquet, another King with ultimate power.  What would she use this great moment to ask for?  The power of influence right then is staggering.  He was surrounded by people that would be a witness to whatever she asks, and they would then be looking to Herod to grant that request.  There was only one problem.  Someone else had influence over this young woman, her mother Herodias.  She went and asked her mother what should she request?  Herodias’ fatal answer meant death for John the Baptist.

I know most of us may never have that kind of history making influence, but that does not let us off the hook.  While our circles of influence may seem small, how we use it can still have far reaching effects.  So it is important to ask, how do I use my influence?

This morning as I think of the continuing message series about mercy I am hearing at church, I know that influence is part of that equation.  Where do I have influence?  How can I use my influence to show God’s mercy to someone else?  Maybe even more important, will I use my influence for my own promotion or will I use it for someone else’s benefit?

We all have influence in various circles in our lives, through work, church, family and friends.   Sometimes we may have a little, and at other times much more, but I believe that one thing is true.  God does not give me influence to squander only on myself, but to help those around me.  And while I may not feel that I have much, I do know that the right thing for me is to advocate for those who may have even less.  Small amount or not, I believe God gives each of us just the right amount.  All it has to be is enough, for “such a time as this”.

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My Rock

20150330-p3301911-e1428356430678-1240x785So this weekend I went to the Pinnacles National Park with my hubby and his parents.  We were all in their RV and it was wonderful.  It is fall, so the park has a total “old west” look to it, which some people may not find the most attractive, but I thought it was gorgeous.  The Pinnacles is known for its rock walls, talus caves and California Condors.

The first day that we hiked, we got to the set of caves on the trail and I had to say some quick prayers before I entered.  I do not like being closed in or confined, whether it is clothes, under water, airplanes and even caves.  I was with my hubby though and I could not hold him back, and to tell you the truth I did not want to hold myself back.  So we went into the cave and I did OK, till we finally got to a point where the outside light was no longer visible.  It was then that I caught my breath for a moment.  To me, this was the place of most danger.  The place where I could not get out quickly if I needed too.  I mean really?  They had just issued an earthquake advisory for Southern California a few days before, and while I was not in the south, we were directly on the San Andreas Fault line.   I am a lifelong Californian and we do not typically get advisories like that, so there must be something to it.  Right?

Well in the middle of the cave, these thoughts flash through my head quickly.    So after hpnm0110another quick prayer, I turned on my light and followed my hubby.  In retrospect, the length of the cave was very short, so I was able to easily get through.  So you would think on day two I wouldn’t have any problem with the cave?  Think again.

The hike we took the next day was even longer, and took us from one side of the park to the other.  It was a wonderful walk enjoying the quiet and the calm of the chaparral.  When we reached the cave on this trail, I felt pretty good.  I figured that if I could survive the first caves, I could survive this one.  I am sure that I said a quick prayer going in, but in looking back it was not enough.  We got to the inside of the cave, and it became dark again so we put our headlamps on.  I was doing Ok, but we came to a point where the further we got the more uncomfortable I became.  It was then we reached a spot where we would could not walk through any more.  We had to literally get on hands and knees to climb up a boulder about six feet up, then crawl through an opening that was probably 4 feet wide.  Now that is a good amount of room, but to a chicken, any smaller spaces seem very disconcerting.  It was at this point that my fear again reared its ugly head.  The words were on my lips to tell my hubby that I wanted to turn around, but I couldn’t.

So I started crawling up to the spot where he was sitting, waiting for me.  The higher I got, the better I felt.  I was cracking up, because I am sure that everyone could hear me.  As with each rock I touched I reminded God that He is my “rock” and my “shelter”.   Before I knew it, I was through the caves and out on the other side.  At that point, my fear seemed a bit silly.

The payoff?  Well the other side of the trail was my favorite part of the whole weekend.  It was beautiful!  There was a “courtyard” on the other side of the caves, surrounded by towering rocks.  After such a long hot walk, it was cool, refreshing and awe inspiring.  I thought as we continued to walk, that I could have missed it all if I had turned back.  I thought about what I wouldn’t have been a part of, if I had let that momentary fear change my direction.

14572759_10209832544864192_8318213139520730873_nI was really encouraged by my experience at the park.   I read the bible and the stories of people are very much alive to me.  They help me see what God has done in the past, and how He is able to work in a person’s life.  To have a more personal reminder though, is even better. It helps me push through that moment of fear and find the courage to keep going.  It reminds me that even in the darkest moment, when the problem is all encompassing, an answer may shine through just a step or two away.

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Of men and joy

And so my children, listen to me, for all who follow my ways are joyful.  Proverbs 8:32

So I enjoy being a mom.   I am not one of the mom’s that laments the fact that her

img_1056-1
Not sure where the floating bunny ears came from.

children have grown.  I loved them when they were little, but as they grew, each age brought its own joy and pain.  I wouldn’t say that I have enjoyed all the stages of their growth, some stages were better than others, but each new screw up brings wisdom.  Or so one hopes.

So one of my oldest son was stressing at work the other day, and had sent me a text to pray.  It was great, because not only did I pray for him, but I was able to give him some encouragement from a blog I had just written. I love when God gives the answer, even before you knew there was a question.  During the conversation, I told him that he should think long and hard about pursuing something that he loved.  That he should spend some time dreaming or imagining what it would look like to make that dream a reality.

So the next day I texted him to check out his stress level and he let me know that he was good.  Me though, I was a different story.  It was a bad day for me, and so by the time I was talking to him, I was finally getting some writing done.  It was then that he said he had been thinking about my writing.  Since he was contemplating his own dreams, he started thinking about my own pursuit.  He asked what kind of writing I wanted to do?  He then proceeded to tell me how Prince wrote two songs a day, even though some were never published.  He then pointed out how very left-brain my writing seemed to be, and that maybe I needed to use the right side for some short fictional stories.  When I told him that I was not sure what I wanted to write, he brought up JK Rowling and how he doubted that she knew exactly what she was writing that first day in the coffee shop.

Our texts finally tapered off and I felt good.  He had given me a different perspective, and that seemed to give me some energy.  I was able to finish a blog post and it was a little different than others I had posted, so I felt good.  Accomplished.

It wasn’t till today that I went back to revisit the texts from my son.  I am so used to being the encouraging one, that to be on the receiving end is a different angle for me.  It was funny, I don’t think he meant to encourage me, I just think he was asking queimg_3126-1stions.  It gives me hope.  Not only for myself and the path that I am taking, but for him and his path of growing and learning who God made him to be.
No, I don’t miss those little boys at all.  They were adorable and I loved them very much, but it is the men that they are growing into that is so much more exciting.   While they still make a lot of mistakes and are not perfect, I can see growth as they continue to learn and gain wisdom.  That above all else brings me joy and gives me hope.

 

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Of Fall and Friends

I was not sure why I looked, but I did.  It may be because it is fall.  I know, most people just get a pumpkin spice latte, but not me.  I become nostalgic.  It might have been because yesterday was such a sucky day.  I slept badly, and did not write till late in the afternoon.  Which means that all the crap that makes my head, spin was not written out and discarded.  It just kept rolling around in my mind till it was ready to burst.  Yesterday afternoon though, I was able to get out, grab some chai and “throw up” for lack of a better term.  I just write down everything in my head and see if I can use any of what is there.

autumn-leaves-smoky-mountains

For some reason this morning, I did not go back to it.  I was feeling nostalgic again and so I did look up some information on my elementary school.  I was trying to picture people and some of the things that shape my memories.  It was then that I looked.  In this day and age of the internet you can find just about anyone, or at least some bit of an electronic trace.  So during childhood I had many friends on and off, and I still keep in touch with a few.  There is one though, that I truly lost touch with. We met during elementary school, continued through Junior high and into the beginning of high school. At some point, we grew apart?

115847-113843Today for some reason, I Googled her name.  OK, so I looked her up through Yahoo, whatever!  When her name
came up, so did a lot of pictures.  Some were of other people, but then I saw her face.  Older, with darker hair but beautiful.  I looked into the face of a person that I remember with fondness, I looked into the face of a person that I loved.  Now get your minds out of the gutter, not that kind of love.   The kind of love you have for a family member that, even though you haven’t seen them for a while, you feel like they had never left your side.

So what do you do when you find someone on the internet?  You of course cyber stalk them.  Do not get the wrong idea, I was not going to camp out at her house or anything.  I went and looked in the usual places for information, FaceBook and Twitter.  I looked for pictures of her, of her family, any information as to where she lived and what she was doing after all these years.  It was exciting to see that she is an actress.  It was something that made sense, in relation to the girl I once knew.  I guess the tap, jazz, acrobat and Hawaiian dance lessons had paid off for her.  I always laughed when she went through the litany of dance classes she had taken, and even with what I listed, I am probably still missing some of them.  As you can imagine, I was a more than a little envious of her training.

autism-puzzle-piece-clip-art-cliparts-co-lilgLt-clipartIt makes me happy to know that she is well.  I remember long conversations when we were younger, but I don’t remember the details.  I cannot put my finger on the why, all I know is what my heart tells me.  All I know is that finding out this new information, is like a piece of a puzzle.  It all seems to fit.   I love fall and the thoughts of old friends.

 

 

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